'My twins are my £35,000 miracles': Woman finally conceives thanks to IVF

LAURA ROSE, 35, from Amersham was desperate to become a mum, as she tells Elaine McLaren.

Laura Rose, battle, baby, IVF, Elaine McLarenS MAG

Proud mum Laura with her twins William and Arthur

“Gazing down at the little bundle sleeping soundly in the Moses basket, I felt a familiar sharp stab in my heart. Turning to her proud mum with a smile firmly pasted on my face, I somehow found the enthusiasm expected of me.

‘She’s beautiful,’ I said brightly. ‘I’m so happy for you.

’I meant it, of course, but back at home with my husband Andy, the tears I’d been holding back all day finally poured out. I couldn’t help but think of how unfair it was.

All our friends were having babies. Why couldn’t it ever be me?

I’d first met Andy at a concert in 2005 when we got chatting in a bar queue. It was so relaxed and easy, I felt like I’d known him for ever.

It was a long journey, but I finally got the happy ending I’d always hoped for

Laura Rose

Starting a family was the last thing on our minds, but by 2008 the heavy periods I’d been suffering since my teens were starting to get me down, so I went to see a specialist. After doing some tests, he told me I had some scarring that might cause problems when I tried to conceive.

Though I’d been told the same thing before years earlier, it hadn’t worried me too much because I hadn’t met anyone I wanted to have children with. This time it was different. I knew Andy was the one and I desperately wanted us to be a family. 

Back at home, I suggested that if it was likely to take some time for me to get pregnant, perhaps we should start trying for a baby straight away. 

I wasn’t sure how Andy would react, so I was delighted when he told me he thought it was a great idea.

I realised just how much I wanted it.I knew it wouldn’t happen immediately and I tried to steel myself, but that didn’t stop the disappointment the following month.

Andy tried to comfort me, reassuring me it would happen for us. 

healthS MAG

Laura with her husband Andy

But after 18 months of trying, each disappointment got harder to bear. I went to see my  GP and, because of my medical history, was referred to see another specialist to discuss IVF immediately. I couldn’t help but feel excited, my thoughts running away with me as I imagined how I would finally be pregnant soon – but it wasn’t the news I’d hoped for.

Because I was young, healthy and there was no clinical reason why I couldn’t get pregnant, the consultant told us to go away and keep trying. If I wasn’t pregnant in six months, he’d consider us for IVF. I was crushed. We’d waited so long already.

Every month that I wasn’t pregnant was still a disappointment, but the IVF treatment was always at the back of my mind.

Finally, in November 2010, the wait was over. As we started the treatment, I was convinced I’d soon be holding my baby. When we were told the first cycle had worked and I was pregnant at last, my excitement went through the roof.

My mind fast-forwarded nine months and I imagined myself with my son or daughter in my arms, pushing them around in their pram and taking them to baby groups.

We had a scan at seven weeks and everything was fine. Andy and I held hands, welling up as we saw the tiny heart beating on the screen.

But less than a week later, I started to bleed heavily. I prayed through my tears that I wouldn’t lose the baby as I was rushed into the examination room. But I knew deep down it was hopeless.

I was devastated and felt stupid for believing it was finally happening for us.

To make matters worse, it had been our only free NHS treatment. If we wanted to try again, we’d have to find the money to pay for it.

With my job as a clinical specialist nurse in children’s diabetes and Andy’s as a food buyer, we didn’t have pots of spare money lying around, but I couldn’t imagine life without a baby. Thankfully, neither could Andy.

Doctors advised us to put our plans on hold for a few months to give my body a chance to recover from the miscarriage.

Determined not to be so naïve the next time around, I spent the time researching IVF online.

A friend of mine had just had a baby through IVF in a clinic in Athens following six failed attempts in the UK. And crucially – to us – the treatment was cheaper than here.

Andy wasn’t keen but I managed to talk him round. I started to feel hopeful again. We started cutting back on our spending, saving every spare penny we had to help fund the treatment. We also put off buying a house.

Then, while we were saving for the treatment, a miracle happened. I was pregnant again – only this time, I’d conceived naturally. I was delighted, of course, but still cautious.

At six weeks, I started to get niggling pains in my stomach. I tried to tell myself it was normal, but a week later the pains were excruciating and I was rushed to hospital.

‘The baby is growing in your Fallopian tube,’ the doctor told me. I could hardly hear him through my tears. ‘We’ve got no choice but to operate.’

Back home I picked myself up, dusted myself off and vowed to get on with it. I knew our chances had halved now I only had one Fallopian tube, but I had to believe we’d be parents one day. ‘If we don’t have hope, what have we got?’ I asked Andy. But inside I felt numb. I was starting to believe it would never happen for us. 

In December 2011, we went to Athens for our first visit to the clinic. Sitting on the plane, I felt a new hope. Surely this time we’d be successful. But it still wasn’t to be.

‘You’re still young and you’ve just proved you can get pregnant naturally,’ the consultant said. It all sounded very familiar. ‘Keep trying for six months. If it doesn’t work, you can have IVF here.’

Six months later, we were sitting in the same office ready to start treatment. Only this time, I wasn’t quite so excited. I’d learned it was better not to be.

So when we found out the treatment had worked I tried to keep my emotions in check. 

Sure enough, seven weeks later, I was rushed into hospital again. Devastatingly, it was another ectopic pregnancy.

Lying on the hospital bed after the emergency surgery, I sank to a new low. They’d had to remove my remaining Fallopian tube. I wasn’t pregnant any more – and any slim chance I’d had of becoming pregnant naturally had just been snatched away from me. Life was too cruel.

But I couldn’t stop now. Andy and I had a happy marriage and we’d been fine without children, 

I told myself. But it wouldn’t have been the life we wanted. Somehow we had to keep trying.In September 2012, we went back to Athens for our third IVF cycle, but that failed too. By our next cycle, in May 2013, I was starting to lose hope. We’d also spent £35,000 – borrowing money from family and on credit cards to pay for it.

‘Maybe it’s time to start looking into other options,’ I’d confided to Andy. ‘We can’t carry on doing this for ever.’

Even when the treatment worked, I couldn’t bring myself to get excited. I didn’t dare hope that this time we’d be parents.

I passed the seven-week mark and, according to the scans, all was fine. But even when the sonographer turned to me with a big smile and told me it was twins, I still wouldn’t allow myself to believe it.

Then, at 13 weeks, I started to bleed. ‘Here we go again,’ I thought with a heavy heart as I headed back to hospital. But to my disbelief, I wasn’t losing the babies. ‘Perhaps these babies are fighters,’ I said to Andy.

Slowly, I started to allow myself to believe it was happening. We’d found out at 20 weeks we were having boys. I didn’t go mad, but I started stocking up on things for the nursery.

William and Arthur were born by Caesarean section in January last year – on my mum’s birthday. Hearing their loud cries piercing the delivery room, I finally relaxed. Holding them in my arms for the first time, I turned to Andy with tears streaming down my cheeks and said, 

‘I knew we were right not to give up hope.’

Every single day, I look at the boys and think how lucky we are to have them. All the money we spent and the heartache we went through – it was all worth it. They’re so happy and contented, and I think it’s because we are too.

We still have some frozen embryos left but we’ve decided to donate them, to give another couple the chance of the happiness we’ve got. It was a long journey, but I finally got the happy ending I’d always hoped for.” 

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