Many of us would fib for our children
WE all know what being a parent means: unleashing unlimited unconditional love, parting with oodles of cash and doing anything in our power to secure our children’s future health, happiness and fulfilment. If we see an obstacle in our beloved offspring’s path, we will devote all our strength and ingenuity to removing it.
We will find the courage to rattle on the doctor’s door if we fear our children are sick. We will gird our loins and tackle the bully’s ferocious parents to protect our children from harm. We will rob Peter to pay Paul, deprive ourselves of treats, sacrifice, plot and plan and shamelessly pull strings to deliver to our children the life we feel they should be enjoying.
Many parents see doing all they can, whatever it takes, to give their children what they feel they deserve as a moral obligation. Would they smash down a barrier in their child’s way? You bet they would and without a qualm. After all they consider fighting for your child’s right to be the best he can be a parent’s bounden duty.
So would they fib and finagle, embroider the truth or dispense with it altogether to bag their child a place at the school of their choice? Most certainly they would, and without a second’s compunction. Would they temporarily rent a property near their desired school, using foul means and hard cash to acquire an address that isn’t really theirs?
They’d do it in a heart-beat. Would they pretend they live with grandma, a distant cousin or an almost stranger in the school’s catchment area? Of course they would. If the falsehood does the job, the coveted place at the plum school justifies the means.
Would they latch on to a child at the school with the same surname and claim that child as a sibling to their own even though there’s no relationship? Yes they would and yes they do.
Even more remarkable, would they risk rotting in hell by falsely claiming to be Catholic, Church of England or any other faith? Glory hallelujah! Without an ounce of shame they’d take Holy Communion, arrange the flowers round the font and shake hands with monsignor or vicar. Can they justify their hypocrisy? You bet they can.
The lie is not for them. It is not for personal gain. It is their sacred role as parents to provide the highest quality of education available for their children and the ducking, diving and telling of porky pies is, therefore, not only justified but blame-free and positively virtuous.
N ow a report by the Chief Adjudicator for schools in England calls for tougher penalties for parents who lie to get their children into the best schools.
There is talk of court appearances and fines running to thousands of pounds. Education Secretary Ed Balls says: “It’s really important that parents who are properly playing by the rules aren’t disadvantaged by some who break the rules or provide false information. That’s not fair.”
Mr Balls is right, unequivocally and utterly correct. Lying is wrong, cheating stinks and manipulating the system is clearly indefensible.
Yet, instead of pontificating, shouldn’t Mr Balls face up to his responsibilities, and, instead of meting out punishments, provide parents with schools of a reliable calibre so parents with concern but no cash won’t feel they have no alternative but playing dirty?
